Ripples

I wrote this a few weeks back, but just didn't post it then, kinda feels like i'm in that place again.

I seem to have lost my way for a while, especially with my writing. It seemed like no one was reading what I’ve been writing, like there’s been no reason for me to go on, after all, if no one is reading what I write, what’s the point, right?

So for a while, I haven’t written a thing, the few posts I had somehow manage to write in my first week on blogger are all I’ve been posting. And I’ve pretty much lost my way in trying to get people to visit the blog. Even though it has almost nothing on it, so far, I found myself being more concerned about people coming to read what I have written rather than actually writing.

Just a few days ago I felt so discouraged I was even asking God, “Lord, give me a sign, just any sign that someone out there is reading this stuff, give me a reason to go on…” I didn’t get any obvious answer then. I mentioned quitting to my girlfriend (yes, I have a girlfriend, most amazing lady this side of the equator…but then again, I am a guy in love, prone to writing drivel when it comes to her. ) and she wouldn’t hear of it.

So I posted another, sent a rough draft to a friend to look over, and his reply raised my spirits, in effect gave me a reason, however simple, to go on. You know what paper looks like when it has gone through a shredder? Yeah, that’s what my draft looked like when he was through with it. But it was what he added to it that really raised my spirits. 

“Incidentally I'm going to follow in your footsteps and write something for my church newsletter this week”

Okay, so maybe it isn’t exactly the answer to a prayer, but something about that simple statement made me really happy. It was like, sure, my writing wasn’t exactly reaching out to my intended audience…yet, but it was making a difference, however small, it was making a difference. And in a way it opened my eyes to one of the ways in which God works… I mean, maybe none of this stuff will ever be read by anyone else, maybe, but what if the articles he writes go on to touch hundreds of lives, go on to change people, to make the idea of salvation real for them. In that case, my work here will have been worth it, is worth it. Kinda made me realize that even the smallest things we do, however unimportant, always have a ripple effect, something small turns out to be something huge. Or maybe, something small, remains small, unimportant, but ends up being the last straw that breaks the camel’s back.

And it showed me that God truly does work in mysterious ways (tired of the clichés?)

It gave me the boost I needed, that faith I needed to just go on, to just do my part and trust God to do the rest, whatever way He sees fit. After all, what I am writing, I am not writing for me, I am writing for God; and I will keep doing that for as long as he requires it of me, whether or not I see the results, cuz I know somewhere, somehow, the ripples are spreading, guided by God…